Ask Me Anything (I’ll Probably Answer It)

I'm still grieving the loss of my very full Curious Cat account that i had with over 2000 answers to all your genuine, beautiful and naughty questions! I made a few posts on social medias here and there about questions you might have for me, so here is a compilation of some of the recent few i received! Hope you like it! You are welcome to submit more questions for me to answer via email, text or social media! :)

Whats something clients think is rare but is actually common?

What clients often think is rare, but is actually very common, is just how human everyone is at the start of a meeting. Being really nervous the first time (and honestly sometimes every time) is far more normal than people imagine. The overthinking, the “am I doing this right?” energy, the sudden awareness of your own hands HAHAAHAH. Feeling inexperienced or a bit insecure? Also extremely common, I love people, I love bodies, I like how unique everyone is. Having specific boundaries or preferences you’re slightly unsure how to say out loud? Very normal too, i work with many people on different levels of autism, i can adapt as much as possible to your needs in a session. And no, you’re not the only one who has ever briefly thought “what if I try this thing for the first time and it goes terribly wrong”  I promise, those thoughts are not as scary in person as they feel in your head 😄

What is one of the most unexpectedly wholesome moments youve had during work?
One of the unexpectedly wholesome moments I’ve had during work isn’t flashy at all.

With a regular, after sex we were just cuddling and ended up falling asleep… and then both woke up at the same time because of his snoring. We just looked at each other like, “well, that happened,” and it made us both laugh. Very normal, very human, oddly sweet.

Another moment that stayed with me was with a client who had just lost his ex, the mother of his child. They weren’t together anymore, but that kind of loss still hits deeply in ways that don’t really care about labels or separation. He came in a few days later, and instead of anything sexual, we just sat there in silence holding hands.It was simple. No big words, just presence. And I don’t think I fully realized in the moment how rare it is for someone to have a space where they can just be in that kind of grief without needing to explain it, fix it or be “therapy-zed” by it.

What people assume is awkward but usually isnt
What people assume is awkward but usually isn’t… honestly, a lot of it is way more normal than people expect. Things like a bit of accidental body noise during pegging, or the occasional “oops, life happens” moment that everyone pretends is a huge disaster in their head but usually gets handled very calmly in real life. The cleanup part after sex is also far less dramatic than people imagine, picking up condoms, doing laundry, resetting the space;  it’s just part of the rhythm of the work, like closing up a shop at the end of the day. Even the more “transactional” moments that people think would feel cold or weird usually don’t; they’re just simple.

Funniest misunderstanding you had in a session
One of the funniest misunderstandings I’ve had in a session was with a client who wanted a BDSM scene and said he was “equipped,” so I naturally assumed that meant I didn’t need to bring anything. I was on tour at the time, so I showed up empty-handed. Turns out… he also showed up empty-handed. Very mutual confidence in our definitions of “equipped.” So we improvised.

What followed was basically a creative chaos session with whatever was available in the space. We ended up using kitchen items in ways I’m pretty sure they were never designed for : Saran Wrap became very convincing bondage before I even knew it was commonly a thing, wooden spoons and even flippers turned into makeshift paddles, and at some point we started putting utensils in the fridge for “temperature play,” which felt extremely scientific at the time. It wasn’t what either of us planned, but it was one of those moments where it just becomes playful, collaborative, and oddly funny instead of stressful. Definitely not what was advertised… but memorable in the best way.

Weirdest but most fun request
One of the weirdest but genuinely fun requests I’ve ever had was a “cream pie” themed session.It started very seriously, almost like a job interview. The idea was to recreate a childhood movie reference, so we were all sitting around a kitchen table with actual whipped cream pies, trying to stay composed while gently and confidently smushing them into each other’s faces without immediately breaking into laughter. It was supposed to be structured… and it absolutely wasn’t after a few moments! At some point it just turned into full chaos of everyone throwing pies in everyones faces. The kind of mess that takes hours to clean, even when everything is covered in plastic and you think you’re prepared for it. You’re not. Cream pies will find a way.

Another recurring version of this kind of play I’ve had is a client who enjoyed watching scenes involving cakes and pies. Each year for his birthday, he would come and watch me sit in pies and cakes. It was so fun! 

It’s one of those things that sounds bizarre on paper, but in reality just becomes very playful, very absurd, and i’m an absurd girly! I’ve had many sessions over the years where you walk out thinking, “I cannot believe this is my job,” Is this work of performance art? Who knows!

What moments made you completely love you professional composure ?
One moment that completely destroyed my professional composure (in the best way) was a nurse roleplay session. It was a group scene with myself and a few other providers, and the client had actually bought really nice matching nurse outfits for all of us, so we were all coordinated and feeling very put together. It was meant to be an “evil nurses doing questionable things to a patient” type of setup, very dramatic, very controlled, very theoretical professionalism.It was also the middle of summer. Which… matters. Very quickly, everything went off the rails. At some point, one of the other providers started using the stethoscope like a microphone, which began as something genuinely kind of sexy and then somehow devolved into whispering things like “saucisse… BBQ saucisse…” while there was actually a BBQ happening somewhere outside the window that we were smelling. Even the client, who was supposed to be the “unconscious patient”,  was laughing so hard he could barely stay in character. At several points I had to physically leave the room because I was fully laughing to the point of tears and choking trying to find my air. It went from “structured roleplay” to complete shared chaos in under five minutes, and there was absolutely no recovering the original scene after that. We still talk about that booking till this day. One of my fav WTF is even happening dates!

What is something clients do that think is subtle but isnt?
What clients often think is subtle, but really isn’t… is trying to bypass screening. It usually feels discreet from the outside, but in reality there’s a very connected, very small community here in Montreal, and most of us do communicate. If something feels off or unclear, people will check in with each other. We genuinely care about each other’s safety.

Another thing that’s way more visible than clients think is nervousness, on both sides. A lot of people assume they’re hiding it well when they arrive, or that they need to appear completely composed. But honestly, the first 20/30 minutes are often just mutual adjustment. A bit of internal panic, a bit of overthinking, a bit of trying to land in the moment. And it’s very normal. We can usually see it, and it’s completely okay. It passes quickly when things settle, and most of the time it just becomes part of the human warm-up rather than anything awkward.

Whats the biggest post session personality shift you’ve ever noticed ?
There are many I can talk about, but one of the biggest post-session personality shifts I’ve ever noticed was with a client who flew me out to Alberta for a very structured interrogation-style roleplay. In session, he was very strict, very controlled, almost intimidating in his role, fully committed to the dynamic and the energy of it. And then afterwards, it was like talking to a completely different person.

He became incredibly sweet, relaxed, almost giggly. We went out to a casino together after and he ended up showing me how he plays roulette, and the whole evening turned into this unexpectedly light, fun, playful experience. It was honestly such a contrast!

What’s a completely normal thing people overthink way too much?
What people overthink way too much is honestly anything around cleanliness, logistics, and anything involving anal or pegging. There’s often this assumption that it’s going to be awkward, complicated when in reality it’s just fun. And if you aren’t into it, we can always stop. No one is forcing you to go through with a fantasy if in the moment you aren’t feeling it anymore. People imagine there’s going to be embarrassment or judgment around things like cleaning up but it’s actually just part of the work. Most of the stress around it exists way more in anticipation than in the actual moment.

Whats a weird side effect of sex work that happens all the time?

A weird side effect of doing sex work that happens to me all the time is that strangers will just… confide in me.It’s almost like I have a “safe to overshare” aura. I’ll be sitting on a bus minding my own business and someone will randomly start telling me about their sexual fantasies or experiences as if we were already in a very specific kind of conversation. No flirting, no real buildup, just immediate one sided conversation about their sex life.

I’ve had similar moments in very normal social settings too. At a birthday dinner with friends, a man at another table spotted me, walked all the way over, through my friends group and introduced himself as “my name is Denis noy Penis”... then immediately started talking about all his watersports fantasies like it was a completely natural dinner conversation with a stranger. Another time, at a work-related event where I was dressed quite conservatively, someone sitting next to me started opening up about his sex life with his wife and asking for advice on how to reconnect intimately with her. Again, very matter-of-fact, like I had somehow been assigned the role of “safe person to ask about this.”

I don’t know if it’s an “aura” or just how people read certain energy, but it’s something that happens often enough that I’ve stopped being surprised by it.