Things I Think Clients Should Invest In Before Seeing a Sex Worker

Let’s talk about something nobody really says out loud but every provider thinks at least once a week. Some things you would think are obvious but by experience aren't.

If you’re going to book a session with a sex worker, it’s not just about "showing up with money and enthusiasm". It’s also about showing up as someone who is making an investment. Investing in yourself is such a pure and beautiful action to reground yourself, re-feel yourself, connect with parts of yourself that you can't reach in "normal settings"... Can that beautiful investment also include a small effort to feel clean, comfortable, and pleasant to be close to...

We, as sex workers, are expected, by default, to invest heavily in grooming, hygiene, skincare, hair removal, nails, scent, lingerie, and presentation before every session. That’s part of the job, and, most of us, take pride in it.

There are a few very basic things I genuinely think clients should also consider investing in, not for us, but for you and for the genuine experience of intimacy overall.

1. Pedicures. Yes. I’m serious.

I need to start here because it is the most immediately memorable one.

Feet matter in sessions more than people think. They’re everywhere: the bed, the floor, touch, positioning, contact and in some sessions worshipped.

And I cannot stress this enough: Long, sharp, untrimmed “bird claw” toenails are not erotic. They are weapons. You do not want to be the person who scratches someone mid-scene because your feet have not seen a nail clipper in six months. You don’t want to have to stop a sexy session mid-way cause you “clawed” someone’s leg and they are now bleeding. A simple pedicure (even just basic trimming and filing) is one of the lowest-effort, highest-impact things you can do for yourself and your provider. But please, invest in a quality relaxing time and treat yourself to a pedicure.

2. Brushing your teeth (this is not optional)

Fresh breath is one of the simplest forms of respect in intimacy.  Brush your teeth. Use mouthwash if you can. Maybe even chew gum right before if needed( throw it out before getting in bed please). Bad breath doesn’t just kill mood, it keeps us as far away as possible from your face. Sometimes a provider refusing to kiss you is because your mouth is currently not approachable. Hard truth but someone has to say it.

If a session involves closeness, kissing, close verbal interaction, or anything face-to-face, this is one of the most important basics. If you have bad breath even after brushing your teeth and mouthwash, please invest in seeing a dentist, something more serious could be happening there. It's important that you take the time to invest in yourself and your health.

3. A proper haircut or barber session

There is something about a clean haircut that instantly changes how someone carries themselves. It doesn’t need to be expensive or high fashion. It makes you feel better in your body, which absolutely changes how you experience intimacy. Confidence starts in small maintenance, not transformation.

4. "Manscaping" and basic intimate grooming

Let’s be clear: nobody is asking you to be hairless. Personally, I don’t really enjoy completely shaved genitals anyway, it often feels a bit unnatural and scratchy. You are welcome to have your pubes in anyway you choose and i will celebrate them. But basic maintenance goes a long way. What i mean is : trimming rather than wilderness, keeping things clean and tidy. If it tangles and makes knots the forest needs to be chopped down a bit or you might lose me in there! hahahah!. And i love a bush...

And beyond aesthetics, hygiene matters. This includes: washing thoroughly with water and gentle soap, cleaning genitals properly, cleaning the perineum and butt area, yes, get deep in the butt crack as well. If you think “this is obvious,” I promise you… it is not obvious to everyone. Clean does not mean perfumed or overdone. It just means actually clean. While we are here, please don’t put deodorant or perfumes in your genitals. It tastes awful. 

5. Basic body hygiene upgrades (the underrated essentials)

Still worth repeating... arrive freshly showered (if you can’t before you leave, we have showers and all the essentials), clean washed hands and nails, deodorant (Doesn’t need to be a perfumed one), clean breath, clean clothes (we understand if you are arriving straight from work). If your skin is dry, maybe take the time to learn about moisturizers and how to keep your skin healthy.

6. Trimmed nails (hands too)

This one is non-negotiable in a lot of scenes. Long fingernails scratch and break delicate skin unintentionally, break latex, nylons, make touch uncomfortable instead of pleasurable. Pass your nails on sensitive skin areas like the tip of your dick, behind your ears, does it scratch or feel nice? A quick file takes two minutes. It changes everything.

7. Wear something intentional (even if it’s simple)

You don’t need designer underwear or fetish gear unless that’s part of your dynamic. But putting on something that feels clean, fitted and intentional shifts how you feel about yourself. It’s less about aesthetics and more about mindset. You showed up for this, this matters. Make yourself feel sexy underneath. It’s fun to undress you! If all your underwear has holes in it and is held by threads of hope, it’s time to invest on yourself a little.

8. Bonus Note, Not and investment but still needs to be said : be a decent human in public (if we are on a date or out together)

I can't believe this still happens... If we are out in public…be kind to wait staff, be polite to service workers, don’t act entitled or dismissive. How someone treats strangers tells me more about you than how you treat me. Also, please be mindful that not every moment needs to broadcast what we are doing. Discretion matters for both of us. Don’t loudly announce sex work dynamics in public, don’t draw unnecessary attention, don’t over-perform the “I’m with a sex worker” energy.

This isn’t about perfection. It’s not about strict standards or moral judgment. It’s about mutual care in a space that is already intimate, vulnerable, and physically close. We do a lot to show up prepared for you. It’s not unreasonable to expect a level of thoughtfulness in return. Make it a little ritual of self love to invest in yourself while you are investing in your intimacy.

Clean is sexy!
Lots of Love
xx
April Killian